See The Beauty



I know it's ironic that I'm writing this on my phone.  I guess I could write it on paper, but the phone is so convenient.  I guess that's why I use it so much.

Convenient to look engaged elsewhere in awkward social situations and avoid talking to people.  My eyes are always glued to the screen. 

It was a typical Monday here in the Florida Keys.  I know you might think that this is a glamorous life I live, but it lost its glamor about two weeks, one sunburn, and hours of dad's boring fishing job into living here.  

I stayed up late Sunday night, snapping my friends, people I know don't actually care about me.  So, when I stumbled into class Monday morning I was completely unprepared.  But what we're a few more F's really?  What did it matter? I had two new followers on Instagram last night!  

My mom picked me up from class and had a full-blown discussion with my sister, but I didn't hear a word.   My earphones were in and I was checking an old acquaintance's story.  

" Did you hear anything I said?" My mom nudges me.  I stare at her blankly. "Yes." I lie not wanting to get in trouble again.  

She sees right through me." Ok, your taking Lucy to her dance performance tonight because your dad has to go out on the boat and I have a PTA meeting for your school."

I groan.

"Don't worry you can take your phone, just watch her performance please."



I work at a small eclectic coffeeshop as a barista, or at least I did until this afternoon.  

I bump into a man on my way in because I am liking my cousin's brother's dog-walker's post.  He spills his hot coffee all over my worn-out hoodie and I feel the heat sink into my skin.  If I were looking at her I would see my manager standing directly in front of me.

"That's the third time in two days you have run into a customer!  You confuse orders because your constantly glued to that stupid screen!  I'm sorry but I have to let you go!"

I stumble out to the worn-out picnic benches and about half a dozen tiny chickens claw about my feet searching for breadcrumbs as I sit there waiting to be picked up. Those chickens are everywhere in the Keys and they always seem like they are looking for something. My brain hurts from thinking about the chickens too much and I return to my phone and look for just the right depressing song to complain about being fired.

I begin nodding off to sleep on the picnic table, when I hear a truck horn.  I wake up and realize my boyfriend is there to pick me up.  

I climb into his old broken-down truck and I immediately turn back to my phone.  I hear a soft hum and realize later that it was his voice.  My phone is so entrancing that all I can give him is a subdued hi and hurried see ya in exchange for him going out of his way to pick me up.

A few hours later, in a different worn out hoodie, I sit on my phone in the theatre.  I plan to watch maybe part of my sister’s dance.  Suddenly I get a text from my boyfriend," You seem distant, maybe we should stop seeing each other."

I panic and forget I'm in a theatre, or that I'm supposed to be watching a dance.  My whole being so consumed with texting him and trying to keep him from breaking up with me.  I hear faint music in the distance, and at one point I hear sympathetic exclamations from the crowd, but I don't look up.

My boyfriend sends a text saying it's over and my heart cracks in half.

I walk backstage with my eyes stinging and get my sister. 

I stop to make a dramatic " He broke up with me" post and my sister runs back to pick something up.  

She raises a small orange flower over my screen and I look at her, really look at her for the first time in years.  There are tears pouring down her face.

Suddenly a swirl of emotion I had lost re-finds me.  A breeze blows through my hair and I hear a voice say," Elizabeth, look, and see the beauty of reality.  Of heartbreak, of the world, and most importantly of people."

I want to bend down and hug Lucy but realize I have no idea what's wrong.  

"What's wrong?"

"Didn't you see the dance?" She sobs.

"No, Dan broke up with me over text while you were dancing.  What happened?" I give her a side hug.  How long has it been since I've hugged someone? 

A wisp of her blond hair falls into her wet eyes. " I went to do my leap and tripped. I fell flat on my face."

Mind flashes back to the distant exclamations of pity I had heard while trying to keep a boyfriend.  

"I'm so sorry."

"I'm sorry about your boyfriend."

We stare at each other for a moment.  It is one of those moments which defines a relationship for the long run.  

Suddenly we are crying in each other's arms and I realize why I had been so miserable here in the Keyes.  I had been just like all those chickens running around the Island, looking for something.  I had been looking for real friendship and human interaction in my phone, when people like my sister could have given it to me all along.


Hey everyone! I hope you enjoyed it, it's the first short story I've every written.  It was inspired by our family vacation to the keys, and behavior I observed.   However, some of it was complete fiction.  I wanted to write something based on this photo and it just started flowing.   Anyway, thanks for reading!

You might be a performer IF...


  • You avoid carbs and sweets for months so you can fit into a costume. but when tech week rolls around eat spitefully.  During tech week, you carb up and devour endless sweets.
  • You have makeup in random places in your room.
  • You have multiple bags you carry everywhere.
  • You have bags under your eyes, CONSTANTLY.
  • You love coffee.
  • You have cough drops in random places.
  • You don't act sick, even if you are.
  • You adored makeup, but don't wear it for weeks after the show because you currently hate it.
  • You start dancing in the middle of Publix.
  • You're room is an organized disaster.
  • You have no social life.
  • You're friends ask if you're even alive.
  • You get really excited about sleep.
  • You spot choreography everywhere.
  • When someone asks you a question you respond with one of your lines.
  • You catch yourself walking around the house like your character.
  • You're family has to ask you to stop singing almost everyday.
  • You wear leggings or joggers everywhere.
  • You have dance shoes in your purse.
  • You have a thousand water bottles, but you can never seem to find one (or at least the one you wanted.)
  • You keep a bunch of out of style clothes because you know that someday they will make the perfect costume.
Do you relate to anything on this list?  What would you add? Comment below!

Christmas Break-Recap

     I have been trying to think of something to write about.  I'm back in a state of perpetual exhaustion.  I guess you could say, I have writer's block.  So, I figured I would tell you about my Christmas break.

     A few days before my last exam, I went to see the Last Jedi with two of my favorite people.  We dressed up as characters from the movie.  We went at two in the afternoon, and got some strange glances, and requests for photos. 

     I finished my last day of school for the semester and climbed into my Dad's truck.  I was ecstatic over having nothing to do.  That night my best friend came over spontaneously and she helped me choose an outfit for my church's special Christmas service.


The Friday before Christmas, I sang at my city's amphitheatre for my Church's special service.
^AMAZING people^
The Saturday before Christmas, we went last minute shopping and to my best friend's house.  Christmas Eve and day were blurry because I had a cold.
Sisters on Christmas day

The week after Christmas, we went to the mall, the zoo, and planned my New Year's Eve/Sweet Sixteen party.

New Years Eve was a day I will tresure for forever.  Becuase of my crazy shedule, my October sweet sixteen was postponed to a New Year's event.  All day Saturday my family worked to clean our house and prepare for the event.  Sunday, I went to church and spent time with my brother.
Can you tell we're related?

That afternoon was full of frantic preparations. Two of my friends came over early and helped me decorate and then we got ready! I did my friend's hair and makeup which was a lot funner than getting ready by my lonesome.

 

The party was a magical success.  I loved beginning the New Year with my friends.

The next few weeks were a blurr.  One of the highlights was when some family friends got married and my brother and I spent time with friends after the wedding.

The rest of break was honestly a blurr and almost boring, except for winter Jam!  We got amazing seats right next to the center stage!
SKILLET!


KARI JOBE!

  
After Winter Jam, I was so ready to start school again!


November recap

Hello world!!!!

I know I have not been keeping up with my end of the moth recaps, but this month was AMAZING.

My month started in Virginia visiting my brother at Liberty University for family weekend, and it was one of my favorite things ever.  I got to spend two night in the girls dorms on my brothers hall and it was the most fun I've had in a long time.  These collage girls stayed up until 3:00 A.M. eating chocolate and talking about their day!

My brother's two best friends from growing up are also attending Liberty so we got to spend some time with their siblings who I've grown up with.


When I got home I threw myself right back into everything.  Rehearsals and school.


Rehearsal was stressful for a while, but I'm making new friends and it's great.  I spent a week in my normal madness, and then it was Thanksgiving break.

The last Friday of doing school before break, I stayed up till 1:00 a.m. because my big brother was coming home!  which may not have been smart because I had rehearsal all day Saturday.  At rehearsal, I got my gorgeous teacher costume!!!


That night my family hit the fair and had an absolute blast just being together.  Sunday I woke up early, for church and sang on the praise team, and then my brother took us over to our mother church's Thanksgiving lunch and that was absolutely wonderful.  Sunday night we went to see our grandparents for an early Thanksgiving with my Dad's side of the family.  Monday, my brother and I went to the beach with friends, and then I had rehearsal.  Tuesday, I worked on a class project about Macbeth and packed.  Wednesday my brother helped me record this... https://youtu.be/GnAyR36jOig

 and then we left for Jacksonville where my Mom's mother lives.  Thursday I was sick and so I took a long Thanksgiving nap.  Friday, I slept in, ate Thanksgiving leftovers, went to see Wonder(which was an AMAZING movie) with my cousins, siblings, parents, aunt, grandmother and great aunt, and that night we met up with friends in Saint Augustine for the nights of ligthts, and then we hit Cracker Barrel. 






Saturday we headed home, but stopped at some outlets, and I got an adorable shirt from Papaya.  Sunday I threw myself back into the madness.  

Here I am it's tech week for the Christmas Carol(opening TOMORROW (WHAT)!!!!!!!!), and Christmas time!


Merry Christmas!

Feeling vs Knowing

Hello friends,

My life has been insane and weird and absolutely wonderful.

As I told my friend recently," I know I'm fine I just don't feel like it."

But that's the thing, it's ok to rest in what you know and not what you feel.

Feelings are testy things that change every second.

What you know and what you feel aren't the same thing.

When I'm in rehearsal  trying to keep small children quiet in the wings or when I'm exhausted and can't sing the way I want to, or when I almost pass out on stage when I'm trying to lead worship, or when I'm  doing school and I've lost my 4.0, I have to rest in what I know.

I know that God is good and He loves me more than I can comprehend.

I know that there are beautiful things and people in this world even when I'm too busy to notice.

I know that I have an amazing, supportive group of friends who are there for me even when I've been to busy to see them.

I know that God's plan for me is perfect.

I know that my family will always be there.

I know that I am made in the image of God and through Christ I am more than a conqueror.

He's in control and I'm not.  He's already written my story.  I'm not holding the pen because God is.







The Only Solid Rock

It's been a bizarre couple of weeks for everyone.

Emotions and fears have been flying everywhere.

First there was Harvey, then Irma, then Maria, then the earthquake, and then the shooting in Las Vegas.

It's also been weird personally.  I've been stressed and buried in homework and dropping grades and the President and Founder of my drama group passed away suddenly from a major heart attack.

Monday,I was at SAT prep and everything was normal and I get in the car and my mom explains the shooting in Vegas.

That night and I got a call from my abf (acting best friend.)  She sounded serious as she told me there was something she had to tell me.  She braced me saying, "this is upsetting," and I sat  down as she told me that the founder and president of our production company, Travis, was in Heaven.  I was breath taken from shock and we sat in silence on the phone.

Thursday was my sweet sixteen and my family was truly wonderful!  That night I went to rehearsal to sing in the choir at the funeral.

Saturday morning I was sitting in the choir loft at the funeral and listening intently.  Travis was a man who left a legacy and I had to ask myself, "What kind of legacy am I making?"

This world is crazy and no when knows when they will leave it.  We have to honor God while we are here.

This morning my church's worship leader put an emphases on the solid rock we have in Jesus.  Nothing else is firm.  Nothing here is trustworthy.

Jesus is the only true safety.  Jesus is the only way to find peace in this world.  When events like these take place, all I can do is run to Jesus.  He will hold me.  He will be glorified.  The fact that the world is crazy does not change the fact that God is God.

"When darkness veils His lovely face, I rest on His unchanging grace.  In every high and stormy gale, my Anchor holds within the veil."


Evacuating Irma- A Bunny's Eye View

Those humans are strange.
They stay indoors for weeks, only coming out to feed me.
Then suddenly they run around like they've lost there minds.
They're taking everything away.
She, the one who feeds me, looks like she's about to cry.  Her hair is falling everywhere and here eyes look larger than normal.   The boy who gives me water and her are carrying everything away.
She takes my food containers.
That dog got out again and those humans have to catch him.
She scoops me out of my comfortable cage and puts me in that dog's crate for a few minutes.  As soon as I get settled she pulls me out and puts me in a tiny box.
They all sound terrified.
I feel her carrying me in the box.
She lets me out and I'm in her bedroom. It looks like every possession she ever had was out.  She wraps up her fragile treasures and puts them in a large box.  Her father knocks on the door.  She looks around the room frantically.  She grabs a few last items and puts me in the tiny box.
I feel her carrying me in the box.
I jolt and we're moving faster than I ever had before.  That dog is spasming out and those humans sound terrified.
She is concerned about me and pulls me out of the box. I take it all in.  We're in a rolling box and the whole family is crammed into it.  The boy is resting on her shoulder.  The dog wants to eat me.  The boy grabs the dog and she puts me back into the tiny box.
We roll for hours and hours stopping at random times.
Finally, she carries my box into a rolling house.
Bright lights and loud voices.
She carries me back to the rolling box.
Hours later she carries me back into the rolling house, sets me down and falls dead asleep on her pile of belongings.
We wake up and she carries me to the rolling box.  We roll for hours and hours and hours.
She pulls me out of the tiny box and I breath fresh, grassy air.  She looks dirty and so does the rest of her family.  They're all covered in that dog's hair.
She puts me back into the tiny box and we roll for hours.
The world gets dark and she puts me into the rolling house.
We wake up and she carries me outside and puts me in a large crate.
Then she disappears.
The world gets dark,she pulls me out of the crate,puts me in the tiny box, and carries me into the rolling house.
We wake up.
I sit in the crate and eat my hay and drink my water.  She pulls me out and lets me run.  She follows me.
She puts me back into the crate.
The world gets dark,she pulls me out of the crate,puts me in the tiny box, and carries me into the rolling house.
We wake up and she puts me in the tiny box and we roll for hours.
The same thing happens, tiny box, crate, tiny box... rolling for hours and hours.  Will she just pick a crate?
We roll for hours suddenly we're back in her room.  She is trying to arrange her luggage. She seems happy.
She puts me back in my comfortable cage and I go to sleep.



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